How to Steal a Train Review by Nafisa Hussain

How To Steal a Train by M.C Shmidt is a humorous collection of ten short stories that portray human nature. These stories explore rebuilding relationships, confronting oneself, how people can cling to human connection, and the varying aspects of daily life. Schmidt depicts these tales in a witty and relatable manner that encourages readers to scan the pages to dive deeper into the context. Each story brings its own unique perspective on aspects of human nature. The title of the book, How to Steal a Train, is in fact its own metaphor for accepting change and growth.

A theme that I find fascinating in these stories is worship. While worship takes many forms in the modern world, these stories focus primarily on two: religious devotion and celebrity worship. The story “The Ohio Stigma of 2009” reveals two sides of a coin when it comes to seeing what is in front of you. Some may argue that it is human nature to believe in a higher power and worship; others may argue that it is in fact the opposite. This piece encapsulates the difference between those who rely on what they see in front of them, and those who rely on faith. It touches on how in both fiction and reality rifts can widen between people because of their differences and how they can choose to set their differences aside, for better or for worse.

However, “We Love You, Ringo,” explores how celebrity worship can lead to one’s downfall. By following the tribute performer’s slow realization that he has been neglecting his own life for a lie, the story reveals the dangers of fame culture. No matter how admired celebrities may be, we can never truly know them for who they are. I see parasocial relationships plenty in celebrity culture—people attempting to embody someone they do not personally know yet they love, or at least think they do. “We Love You, Ringo” is a wake-up call to not neglect your own life in lieuof worshiping someone else’s.

“The Middle Distance” was my personal favorite in Schmidt’s collection—a story about fatality and the natural defiance of it. Katherine’s father, Malcom, delivers a powerful monologue about the reality of aging. A delivery that unfolds the struggle about a loss of control; “Being old means not dying. It means waking up tomorrow with your body incrementally more restricted (…) and wondering if you’ve become less for it.” The narrative portrays the defiance that humans have against something as natural as aging. Katherine refuses to stay stationary. As she climbs the tree, metaphorically challenging life’s inevitabilites, readers root for her to reach the top just as vehemently as her father does.

The themes of second chances and re-connection are explored in a few of Schmidt’s short stories. In “‘”Gnats,” those themes are developed through the cynical yet hilarious telling of a widower’s home being overrun by gnats, only for those gnats to vanish when he opens himself up to a second chance. “On Being Born Again” explores a lost Audra, anxious about a reunion with the daughter she let down, only to realize that there is a chance for a relationship for them. “The Dream Girls” follows a grieving Boris and his beloved sourdough starter forced into an awkward reunion with Audra, which blossoms into the potential for more.

This book ends the collection with a metaphor about change. “Do you think it’s possible to steal a train?” Audra texts Boris after their escapade to the horror convention in “The Dream Girls.” While Boris takes the question literally, Audra reveals that it is more to consider behind the idea. How to Steal a Train is about opening yourself up to more.

How to Steal a Train allowed me to focus on the small interactions that can lead to something much greater. This collection is relatable not only in its exploration of weighty themes, including worship, aging, and death, but also in the way Shmidt portrays the wide range of human emotions. Whether it was Katherine’s defiance, Boris’s anxiety, or Audra’s self-doubt, I was able to see a part of myself in these stories. Shmidt’s ability to capture the emotions and experiences of contemporary life makes these stories feel deeply human.

If you enjoy character-centric stories that explore hope, anxiety, and what it means to be human, How To Steal a Train will engulf you into the lives of those who are trying their best in the only way they know how.

Order your copy of How to Steal a Train.

---